Oldest animal in the world killed

So...

Back in 2006, a clam was found near Iceland, during a study into the effects of climate change. The clam was removed from the sea bed and it's life came to an end when researchers from Bangor University opened it's shell for analysis - killing the clam in the process.
Now, seven years after the discovery, by counting the number of rings on the outside of the shell, scientists calculated that Ming, the mollusc, was born around 1499. The mollusc was named after the Chinese Ming dynasty, which was in power when it was alive. It was swimming in the oceans before Henry VIII took the English throne and Elisabeth I oversaw the rise of the British empire and at 507 years old, it was killed by human curiosity!

Nice one, lads!



Strip Club owner buys house next door to ex-wife...

So...

(love this one)

He's been shot twice, and he once was the target of a murder contract. He wrote an autobiography and bought and sold 11 local topless clubs. His name is Alan Markovitz and at 59, he demonstrates that age is but a number by pulling off the most immature yet amazingly brilliant move - he bought the house next door to his ex wife, purely so he could flip her and their daughter the middle finger 24/7, erecting a big statue - OF A FLIPPED MIDDLE FINGER!



Alan Markovitz, AKA The Topless Prophet, star of an HBO reality show, told Deadline Detroit: 'I'm so over her', which is exactly the sane, calm and rational response, displayed so eloquently through his choice of backyard sculpture.


Buying a Detroit property: A second mortgage
Outdoor spotlight: $300
Giant 12ft bronzed middle finger statue: $7,000
Flipping off your ex-wife for the rest of her life every morning, afternoon and night: PRICELESS!



(excerpts from this post taken from: www.futuremusicgroup.com.au)

Russian man nails testicles to Red Square

So...

A Russian performance artist stripped naked and nailed his testicles to a Red Square cobblestone
in protest against Police brutality!

Shit man, I have to admit it, this guy has balls!!!


Police quiz 12-year old boy for flicking a rubber band

So...

Leicestershire must be a very peaceful place as two police officers took time out of a busy Saturday night shift to question and tell off a boy over a rubber band flicking incident and alleged bullying at his school.
Angela Brightwell was home with her son, both watching The X-Factor (which is probably a much more serious offense), when 2 police officers came over to accuse the boy of being a bully for flicking a rubber band onto a pupil's face on the playground.

A bit stretchy if you ask me...


Religion freakshow gone mad!

So...

Christians in Poland are angry and protesting against LIDL, the supermarket, for having this Goat's cheese on sale for 6.66 zloty!

To make everyone happy, I suggest LIDL start charging christians, 7.77 zloty instead!

Man sues wife over ugly children. AND WINS CASE!

So...

Chinese man has divorced and sued his (now ex) wife for giving birth to an “extremely ugly baby girl”
Jian Fing refused to believe the baby was his when it was born, so he accused his wife of infidelity, as a baby so ugly couldn’t possibly have come from such a perfect man like him.
Once the DNA test confirmed the child was his, Fing’s wife revealed that she had undergone over $100,000 worth of plastic surgery before they had met.



Fing immediately realized he no longer loved his wife and they got divorced.
His statement is pretty amazing... “I married my wife out of love, but as soon as we had our first daughter, we began having marital issues. Our daughter was incredibly ugly, to the point where it horrified me

Taking the case to court, the judge agreed that Fing’s wife did trick him into thinking she was beautiful, and ordered her to pay $120,000 for the dupe.

This is ridiculous. Sure the man is a dreamboat, but how he possibly expects us mere mortals to live up to his mind-blowing intense beauty is beyond us. The daughter was destined to fail from the beginning, just like the rest of us. If only we had just a slice of the delicious aesthetic that Fing has. Oh Fing, what we wouldn’t do to be like you!